Baby Steps to a Better Me

When my kids were young, they loved Dana Carvey's movie, Master of Disguise. I still see Dana clapping his hands together in rhythm while chanting, "I want to be the master of disguise, I want to be the master of disguise."

This morning I felt myself saying, “I want to be a better version of myself.” It was minus the hand-clapping because it doesn’t have the cadence to it and my wife was asleep.

Last year I said I want to be in a different place next year than I am today and that happened. I have a new job. We have an empty nest. But now I want to make this place better by being better myself.

It’s gonna take a year or more to get there. I don’t want to be perfect...well, I do...but I know it’s not realistic and I know God doesn’t expect it.

I don’t have a goal of what it looks like. It’s too early to tell. I just want to make progress toward sanctification. You know that word we use in church to describe the process of becoming more like Christ.

There are so many things Christ did for us on the cross. He rendered us justified, forgiven and positionally right with God, but sanctification is the thing He chose to partner with us on to make happen. It requires my cooperation, my willingness, my involvement. It’s not about earning, but yearning to follow Jesus.

My desire for this new year is to give momentum to the work God wants to do in me. I’m not going out to buy running shoes or a weight set, yet. I am going to start with, as Bill Murray put it, baby steps.

My granddaughter is a little over 7 months old. This time next year, she will be running. For me...I will settle for a leisurely stroll with God in the garden of His love.

Wholly Captivated

I am fearfully and wonderfully made
Who else, but the God of the universe
could form me, transform me and conform me
into the image of His Son with such patience,
love and devotion.
I am wholly captivated by His holy presence in me
as I am slowly becoming more like Him.
The manifest work of God permeates
every facet of my being bringing beauty
out of brokenness and fecundity out of fragmentation.
My soul shutters at the thundering crash
of silence as I pause to hear your still small voice.
It echoes off the mountains and bubbles from the fountains
only heard through the sounds when I quiet my heart.
Be still my soul.
Of the countless sayings by the sons of men
It is your Word and your words that I long for.
My life drenched in grace, hurried in pace
has found a place where I am known.
Come tabernacle with me at the altar of my life.
I desperately need your presence.
My parts are merging at your gentle urging
and my path converging with this passionate clan.
Bind our hearts with the yoke of Christ
that we may be one as you are.

A Fast from Fast

The hardest part of exercise, for me, is not the exertion or exhaustion. It's not the perspiration or the pain.  It's the stretching.  It feels like a waste of time and you go nowhere.  You just sit there and twist and turn and pull and bend.  There is no forward motion.  You don't increase your heart rate.  There is no Fitbit goal of how much you stretched today.  I hate stretching.

So, I have been experiencing some lower back pain and hip pain as I have been running.  I visited my doctor to see if he has any suggestions and to make sure I wasn't doing any damage.  Come to find out I need to stretch.  Not stretch more, just stretch.  You see, I haven't been stretching, at all.

I only have so much time in my day.  I am a busy guy, with lot's on his plate and stretching isn't something I have time for.

The most difficult discipline that I have encountered, in my half century on planet earth is sharpening the saw.  I am a doer; a man of action; sidelines don't become me.  But the older I get, the more I am faced with the reality that retooling is a necessity of life and we all need down time to function better.

In my younger days, I could just muscle through things, but now my strength, sight, reflexes and acuity are not what they used to be and everything takes longer.

I don't want to slow down.  I am not good at slow or down.  My nickname for years has been the Energizer Bunny.  The only slow I do is cooking, but even there I am actively preparing other things while the roast or barbecue or reduction is happening.

I have never been one for meditation, contemplation or reflection.  I like the One Minute Manager, the Express checkout and the FastPass.  When the first Macintosh came out, back in the early 80's, I was impressed, but when I was introduced to the x86 PC, I fell in love.  The box was bigger and clunkier, the screen was not as pretty, but boy was it fast; way faster than the Mac.  Ever since then, life has been in the fast lane.  Meditation is something you do while waiting in line at the bank, in between texts.

A passages of Scripture that challenges me is Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God..."  The psalmist is saying that one of the best ways for me understand God is to stop moving.  Arrrgghh!  Do you think He is trying to tell me something?  I hate it when I'm wrong.  You wouldn't think it would frustrate me so, seeing as though I am often wrong, but it still irks me.

As a pastor, I work six days a week and on the seventh day, I preach.  There is no resting and yet, if God can do it, shouldn't I?  I'd like that to be a rhetorical question, but, unfortunately, it is not.

It's time to take time; time to make time, for slowing down.  The clock will not slow down, only I can.  Jesus modeled an unhurried life and if anyone had a reason to be urgent, it was Christ.  So I am taking on the yoke of Christ and choosing to go at His unhurried pace.  I am going on a fast from fast.  It's time to break fast, if you know what I mean.

Falling in Love

Falling in love is a misnomer.  Falling happens suddenly.  You can fall asleep, fall off a cliff and fall from grace in a very short period of time, but love doesn't happen that way.  People who "fall in love" with each other quickly misunderstand the meaning of love.  Lust and like can come on without warning, and they can feel amazing, but love, real love, is so much more.
Love is holding someone's hair while they hurl their guts out after their third round of chemo.  Love is letting your spouse sleep while you get up, for the fifth time, in the middle of the night to calm a crying baby.  Love is selling your collector's edition baseball cards to pay for your partner to finish their education.
If you can fall for these situations with a person you just met, then maybe you can fall in love, but usually, this kind of relationship takes time, takes effort, takes sacrifice.  Few budding romances are able to achieve this level of intimacy and depth in a short period of time.
So next time you fall in "love at first sight", ask yourself these questions:
How many times have I fallen for someone, "at first sight," and how long has it lasted?  Could I hold this persons hair while they vomit?  Could I love them without hair? If I couldn't have sex with this person, would I still love them?
Love shouldn't be easily given, but when it is given, it should be given deeply and when it is reciprocal, then the feelings, the intimacy, the sex, will be the best you have ever had.

Between the Nails

Between the sinners you stood alone

One carried shame, the others stone.
You wrote their sins into the sand
And then the rocks fell from their hands.
Into her eyes you saw right through,
Into a heart that needed you.
No judgment cast, there was no score.
You are now free, go sin no more.

Between the heavens and the earth
You made a way for second birth.
Between the cradle and the grave
You came to save.
Between the hope and hopeless ones
You called them daughters and your sons.
Between my sin and my regret
You paid my debt.

Between two sinners you chose to die
Up on the cross for such as I.
You bore my sin and my disgrace
So I could look into God's face.
You took the pain of every lash
Upon your back to clear my past.
What hurts the most, is not my sin,
But for just me you'd die again.

Now my life has been made clean

You gave your all, no in between.

You had a choice of throne or cross

You took the loss.

Now you stand between my shame

And the one who stakes a claim.

You show the marks you gladly bore.

He rules no more.

Between two roads I walk with you

You give me strength to carry through

When I recall what you have shown.

No matter what, I'm not alone.

When darkness comes and surrounds me

You light the way so I can see.

I am forever wholly yours

From hear on earth to heavens shores.

Between the heavens and the earth
You made a way for second birth.
Between the cradle and the grave
You came to save.
Between the hope and hopeless ones
You called them daughters and your sons
Between my sin and my regret
You paid my debt.

Between the path that's traveled less

I choose a life of righteousness,

Not of my own, I did not pay

The price for freedom on that day.

You broke the bread and poured new wine.

You gave your life and ransomed mine.

Between the nails upon the tree

You set me free.

To Sin or Not to Sin?

That is the question.  Whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of judging Christians or take refuge behind a sea of rules and by embracing, burden our souls by the very bondage we were set free from.  To shed the law, perchance to be free: ay, there's the rub!  For in that freedom, what dreams may come, when we have shuffled off this mortal flesh, must give us pause.

The Law came in so that our transgressions would increase (Rom 5:20).  So is the Law bad?  No, just the opposite.  It was the very thing that opened the door for the grace of God to pour out in even greater measure.  So should we sin more so we get more grace?  To paraphrase Paul, "Oh heavens, no!"

So here lies the rub;  Jesus said that he did not come to abolish the law, but to fulfill it, but Paul said that we are no longer under the law.  If the law was the standard for sin, are we no longer under sin?  YES!!!

When we live in Christ, the law is a mute point for love becomes our plum line and it does what the law could never do; it changes the paradigm from not doing bad to doing good.

I choose not to live with the question of sinning or not sinning, but rather am I loving or not loving.

I confess that this is a teaser for a series of messages I will be giving in the next few weeks.  If this topic has grabbed your ear, I encourage you to join us or listen to the audio files on the emersionlife website.  Details for when and were we meet are on the site as well.

A Shift in the Universe

Psychologists say that when there is a paradigm shift in a person, it is equivalent to their universe changing.  Core values and perceived reality are the cornerstones of our lives and when those change, our world can come crashing down....or....it can be the start of something new and amazing.

The church has wrestled with issues of diversity from it's inception.  Eating meat sacrificed to idols, once taught as sin, was now acceptable.  Gentile believers, labor on the Sabbath and women equal to men were all issues that the early church fought over.  And that was 2000 years ago.

Since then slavery, music, baptism, women in ministry, spiritual gifts and same gender relationships have challenged the churches unity.  The funny thing is that none of these are core issues to salvation, nor issues that Jesus spoke against, and yet, somehow, we feel the need to defend them, one way or another.

My background is very conservative, and my paradigm of understanding is being shaken.  I am beginning to see the cracks in the armor and the light of God's grace is seeping through.  It's a bit unnerving, but isn't God known for that and shouldn't we be used to it by now?

I choose God over my beliefs.  I choose God over my comfort.  I would rather have my world crumble and God have to pic up the pieces of my shattered soul than stand strong on a foundation of misperception, boasting in my ignorance and clinging to safety, apart from Him.

Here's to a new reality.

Kintsukuroi for Christ

The older I get the more I am made aware of the fragility of life and my own humanity.  I am not as strong as I used to be, nor as fast.  My brain does not function as the same pace. My eyes are failing.  My ears cannot hear the range of sounds they used to and my stomach cannot consume the amount nor the variety of food it once could.

Don't get me wrong; I'm not complaining.  I wouldn't trade this place in life for all of the previous years combined.  I may not be the man I once was, but in some ways I am better than I ever was.

Paul the Apostle wrote in 2 Corinthians 4:7, "We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves."  

The truth is, we have always been jars of clay and our strength has always been relative. In our youth, we only think we are strong. Our weakness is that we don't know how weak we really are till we are broken. Then and only then, can God's shining light pour through our cracks and be the strength we thought we were. Only He can mend the crevasses and be our power in weakness as Paul talked about.

Have you ever heard of Kintsukuroi? It is a Japanese art form of rare beauty where they take broken clay vessels and repair them with gold.

It is stronger, at the broken places and more beautiful than it's original state. Is that not God? Does He not make us strong in our weakness and more beautiful in our brokenness?
I am not the guy I used to be and boy am I glad. I am grateful to be the man I am now, by the grace of God and I have come to value my cracks, flaws and weaknesses as opportunities for God to shine through and for Him to fill them with His strength and make me a Kintsukuroi for Christ.

Of God's love.

Of God's love, J. I. Packer wrote, "His love is an incomprehensibly vast, bottomless, shoreless sea before which we kneel in joyful silence and from which the loftiest eloquence retreats confused and abashed."

I was rendered speechless upon reading those words as I was preparing a message on the love of God for Sunday morning.  How in the world was I to do justice to this topic when those words haunted me?

The truth is, it is not our job to try to explain God's love, only introduce people to the author.

When God showed His love to us, through Jesus Christ, He made it easy to navigate that shoreless sea.  "Give me Jesus," the words of the song exclaim.  "Give them Jesus," the words of God proclaim.

So how did I communicate the vast, bottomless, shoreless sea of God's love.  I gave them Jesus.

Eph 3:14 For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, 15 from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, 16 that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.

Where sin abounds...

How sinful is the world? Calculate all of the sin in of all of the world. Start with your self. Add up each sin you have ever committed and add to it those you have yet to commit. Now think of every person living, from the most innocent to the most vile and what is their sum, past and future. Now add to that every person that has ever lived and all of their sinfulness. How sinful is the world? Staggering!

Where sin abounds, grace abounds even more.Read it again.Read it again. Out loud. Seriously.

Paul's words to us in Romans 5:20 remind us of this great truth.Don’t ever think that the life is more evil than good. God’s goodness, His grace and His mercy far exceed and out weigh all that is wrong in the world. His grace is our salvation; literally. It doesn't just tip the scales, it breaks the scales, the chains and the tables. And as if that weren't enough add to that John 1:16.

14 And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth. 15 John testified about Him and cried out, saying, “This was He of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me has a higher rank than I, for He existed before me.’” 16 For of His fullness we have all received, and grace upon grace. 17 For the Law was given through Moses; grace and truth were realized through Jesus Christ. 18 No one has seen God at any time; the only begotten God who is in the bosom of the Father, He has explained Him.

Not just abounding grace, but abounding grace upon abounding grace. The God of the double portion. His grace is sufficient not just for my sin, but for all of mankind throughout all of history and the future. None of us deserve is, nor can we earn it, but then again, that is what makes it grace. We can receive it, though, and watch it's transformational power change us into people of grace so that we can be the abounding grace this world so desperately needs.

To Abundancy and Beyond

On Sunday, our church continued a study of the attributes of God, focusing this week on His goodness.  Up until this point, it has been about His power, knowledge, presence, existence, sovereignty, holiness and justice.  All amazing attributes, but not a lot of stuff to make you want to cuddle up in the lap of your Heavenly Father.  Learning about His goodness was like waking up in a mountain cabin near a waterfall where the water spray catches the light, causing a rainbow to shine over a field of wildflowers and puppies*.  His goodness is what makes life beautiful.

Think if it this way.  If God were to say, "I will fill your cup," then His faithfulness will ensure that it is done.  God's righteousness will make sure the cup is completely full.  But His goodness?  His goodness will fill it to overflowing; pouring over the top and spilling out all over the place.

He does that for two reasons.  First, He loves to bless His children in an exceedingly abundant manor.  Secondly, when we have more than enough, we have plenty to pour out on others in just the same fashion that God lavished it on us.  Double blessings all around.

God loves to pour out blessings.  Our job is to faithfully pursue Him.  We don't pursue the blessings, just Him.  And when we cry, "God, show us your glory," then He will do as He did with Moses and pass His goodness right in front of us in such a measure as we will not be able to contain it.

God, show us your glory today.

*(sorry, an inside joke for those who were there on Sunday)

In it for the long haul

I went to a financial seminar the other day where they talked about investing in the stock market.  The market goes up and down on a daily basis and over the years has seen losses and gains on an annual basis.  The speaker noted that the key to successful investment in the stock market is to invest gradually and leave it in over time.  Putting money in and pulling it out as the market fluctuates is bad business.  Let me illustrate.

Taking the years from 1978 to the present (a 35 year period), you can look at any one year period and the worst year the market did had a loss of 37%.  So if you put your money in for that year only and took it out, you would have lost 37 cents on the dollar.  No one wants that.

Had you picked the best year the stock market did in that 35 year period and invested your money, you would have made 37.58%.  Great earnings, you just had to guess the right year.  Good luck calling that shot.

Now let's say you decided to leave your money in for five years.  How would you fair?  The best five year period had a gain of 28.56%.  Not bad.  The worst loss in any given five year period was only 2.3%.  Now you begin to see how waiting out the ups and downs begins to pay off.  Minimal chance of loss with good potential gains.

Now extend the hold to 10 years.  For any 10 year period of time between 1978 and 2013, the best returns were 19.21%.  Not as great as the 5 year gains, but the possible losses drop to only 1.38%.  The odds are even greater in your favor for worthwhile returns with low chance of loss.

Here is where the real money goes on Wall Street.  Let's say you invest your money purchasing stocks and you leave it in for 20 years.  A long time to not touch your money, but if we are looking at future retirement, this is the way to go.  For any 20 period of time during that 35 year period, the best returns were 17.88%.  In investment terms, that is a great return.  Savings accounts are only giving about 1% currently.

Now for the kicker.  The worst 20 period of time between 1978 and 2013 had a net gain of 7.81%.  That's right.  No 20 period, during that time, lost money and the worst 20 years gained almost 8%.  So it pays to stay in it for the long haul.

Why did I share that information?  Well, we all can use to learn a little about finances from time to time, but the real reason is the spiritual implication.

Our relationship with God needs to be viewed like the stock market.  If we look at any one year of our lives, we can see ups and downs, struggles and triumphs.  If you were to gauge your walk with God on any given year, one may conclude that God is nowhere to be found or doesn't care.  We all go through dark places, and God is always with us, but many times we don't feel it.  They we have years that God feels very present and active in our lives and we think He is the bomb.  But when you stretch out your relationship with him over five, 10 or 20 years, a pattern begins to emerge.  The graph slowly rises with little dips along the way and we see His faithfulness is ever increasing.  We see Him for who He truly is; the God of the long haul.

Our problem is that we are short sighted and can't see the big picture.  We only see the day to day; we can't see the forest through the trees.  But God sees our lives from beginning to end and He knows that the momentary light afflictions that we experience are fractional compared the wonderful riches of His great love, poured out over time.

I will admit there were years where I was ready to give up on God and even more so, on myself, but if I look over the past 20 years, God has proven himself faithful and having stuck it out with him, I have grown so much I can hardly believe it.

So do yourself a favor.  Invest some money for your long term needs, but even more importantly, invest your life in God for the long haul.  He is faithful to complete what he started and the end result will leave you speechless.

Prometheus, Frankenstein and Carl Sagan walk into a bar...

No, this is not the start of a bad joke.  It's the speculation of what their topic of conversation will be.  I am sure they will talk about mankind and somewhere, there will be discussion of the existence of God.  Why do I say that?  Because, in my recent study of the attributes of God, these names kept coming up.

Does God exist?  That is not a question that I ever entertained.  My question was more along the lines of the significance of his existence to my life.

“There is something at work in my soul, which I do not understand.” 
― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

We seek a God we don't understand to bring light to our existence, our purpose.  Yet, he is not hiding from us.  He simply wants us to want to know him.

Our serices, this Fall, is Knowing God.  Who is he and why do I want to know?  Tonight we will talk about Prometheus, Frankenstein and Sagan and why they play a role in discovering God.  Join us. Click here for details.

A Change is in the Wind

Well, I have a confession to make.  I haven't updated my blog for some time and a lot has been happening.  Since our launch at the beginning of the year, we have moved locations.

Our new location is 540 W Baseline Rd Unit 16, Claremont.

We are starting a new series on Knowing God and I think it is going to rock our socks off.

I look forward to seeing you all.

Soul Worship

The launch of our new worship time, for people in ministry, was a success.  We are starting our weekly gathering tonight, Jan 14, 2013 at 7:00pm.

We don't expect everyone in ministry to come.  Nor do we expect everyone who comes to make it every week.  People in ministry are usually very busy people.  Our hope is that enough people will find it valuable enough that each week, there will be a core of people to worship together and receive prayer.

This is an adults only time with no childcare provided at present.

Make it a night with your spouse, leave the kids at home, grab dinner beforehand and come cap the evening with inner refreshment sans the tug of ministry responsibilities.

It's casual attire and casual worship. This time is for you.  Our desire is to provide space for hearing God's voice and intimate time with your heavenly Father.

re:nu

Renovo. It means "renew" in Latin, as in to renovate, refresh or rejuvenate; something we all need.  Too often we are so busy doing, giving, serving and helping, that we don't stop to breathe, rest or recharge.  And I, like Paul, am the chief of all sinners in this way.

So...if there was a place where you could sit by the wellspring of God and let the refreshing streams of water pour over your thirsty soul, would you go there?  Would you take the time to reignite the fire, recharge the batteries, restore your spiritual passion?

The ministry I work for, emersionlife, is providing a place, space, and an environment for some soul oasis time.  We are committed to invigorating leaders and servants for ministry that He as called them to.  This will be an ongoing ministry to leaders and those serving in other churches who don't have opportunity to get refreshed.

We are launching this place on Monday, December 17th at 7:00pm.  Check out our website for more details.

This is not a new "church" in the formal sense.  It is ministry to those in other churches.  It is the larger body of Christ serving the local body of Christ.

So come find refreshment and rest in His presence.

Of Jell-O, Locomotives and Libraries

Peter Cooper might not be a household name, but our lives would not be the same without him.  He lived during the heart of the industrial revolution and was an inventor, business man, politician and philanthropist.  He is best know for his Tom Thumb steam locomotive, but he also patented the first gelatin dessert which became Jell-O.

What I admire most about Mr. Cooper is that, even after he amassed a vast amount of wealth, he always saw it as an opportunity to give back.  he was quoted as saying, "I have endeavored to remember that the object of life is to do good." 

He started Cooper's Union, an arts and science college that, to this day, is tuition free.  His charitable activities and generosity had such a great impact that men the likes of Andrew Carnegie,  Matthew Vassar and Ezra Cornell credit their philanthropy to his influence on them.

Peter truly loved his neighbor as himself.  He lived well below his means so others could have the means to live well.

We are not on earth to attain, but to adorn.  We do not live to get, but to give.  If everyone gave, everyone would get.  If we love God and love people, guess what?  We will be loved by God and loved by people.

God really started it all.  He was the first "pay it forward" one to risk.

We are in this world together.  Let's make the most of it.  Let's give it up for good.

Love Yourself as Your Neighbor

Sounds funny, doesn't it?  But is it wrong to reverse the phrase?  Christ's call is to equally love our neighbors as ourselves.  So it seems logical that we should equally love ourselves as we do our neighbors.  But are we loving our neighbors?  And if not, are we then not truly loving ourselves?

I have been reading Thomas Merton's book, "No Man is an Island," and I am struck with his assertion that  "...(man) cannot find himself in himself alone, bu that he must find himself in and through others."  In a world of self help consumerism and people trying to "find" themselves, we realize that the answer is in God's two simple commands that sum up, in toto, His purpose for us all:  Love God, love people.

We cannot divorce our love of self from our love of others, nor can we separate either from our love of God and His love of us.  It is all linked.  And until we live this out, I don't think our economic and social decline with recover.

(more to follow...and the answer lies in Jello, railroads and libraries)

When Mountains Move.

A mountain moved today. It wasn’t one you’ve heard of and it didn’t cause any damage. In fact, it did a world of good. My soul shook as God changed the landscape of my heart. It surprised me, as any tremor would, but you would think I would be used to it by now; especially living in Southern California and especially with the history I have watching God work.

Why am I so surprised when I say “yes” to God and things start happening? It never fails. For 40 years, when I walk in obedience to His voice, stuff begins to move. Not always quickly or easily, but definitely shifting occurs.

This morning a friend and I were having breakfast, talking about life, ministry and wanting to be in alignment with God’s movement. We both made the commitment to not just say we wanted to make a difference in people’s lives, but we vowed to put it to action; something we had talked far too long about and didn’t do.

So, I got home and wrote an email to a business acquaintance and asked if he would be interested in using his resources to assist us in making a difference. It took me longer to write the email than to get a response of enthusiastic support.

Why am I surprised? Maybe it’s the disciple’s syndrome. “Oh me of little faith.” Maybe it’s the other times that I do ask and get no response. Sometimes what I ask for and what God asks for are completely different. That is when static energy takes effect. But when what I ask for and what God asks for are in alignment, mountains move.

A mountain moved today. Did you feel it? I did. Maybe it was in me. Maybe it was in the spiritual realm. Maybe both. You may not have felt it, but you will see the result of the global shift. How do I know? Because when God moves mountains, things change.

Our God is an "Awesome" God

We sing, “Our God is an Awesome God,” with joy and enthusiasm, but the other day, I started really thinking about our awesome God.

Do you realize that the word “awesome” is less like the surfer definition of “cool” and more like standing in front of a volcano that just release it pyroclastic cloud, “oh God?”  It has within it the notion of fear and terror at the sheer power of what is being viewed.

I remember the first Indian Jones movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark. (Spoiler alert for those too young to have seen it yet, thinking it’s an OLD movie)  When they open the ark and people’s heads explode, and faces melt and bodies evaporate; that is the normal response to awe.

When President Bush talked about the gulf war and the campaign of shock and awe; that wasn’t to make the enemy think we were cool.  It was to scare the crap out of them.

Awe strikes fear in us and brings us to our knees.  It lays us prostrate on the floor, faces buried so deep, we can barely breathe.  From awe, we get awful; full of awe.

Our God is an awesome God.  I believe that from the depth of my being.  And sometimes, he scares the shit out of me.  Why do you think I keep busy all the time?  Because I’m afraid of what He is going to say.

Fortunately, He is not just awesome.  He is kind, gentle and loving.  Without His breadth of character, he would consume us with his holiness, jealousy and wrath.  But, he loves us, oh, how he loves us.  With the totality of His love being poured out on us, His awesome power is diffused in its flow, and his grace transforms his wrath to tender mercy.

So, the next time you sing that song, remember; that which is awesome about God should make us truly appreciate his unfailing love.

What is the Church supposed to look like?

Missional, kingdom, traditional, relevant, expositional, apostalic? 

Yes.

No. 

All of the above. 

None of the above?

Is it supposed to look like Christ or like Christ in us?

The truth is it’s supposed to look real and authentic and imperfect and reflect the personality of the people who make it up as they journey the God path.  Paul said, “Imitate me as I imitate Christ.”  I don’t think he meant us to do the same things he did and mimic his moves.  I think he meant to passionately follow God with abandon and sacrifice.  For all of us, that pursuit will look different.

Our journeys will parallel and overlap, but they will not always look the same.  And neither will the churches’.

I went through the phase in seminary of judging other churches about not being Bible-centered enough.  Then I went through the phase of churches of not being practical enough.  After a while, I was looking at churches and wondering why that can’t be more edgy and emergent.  I think, as the church, we are guilty of flowing with the culture.  I apologize.

I don’t know if it’s my age or just where I am in my journey, but I just want a place where we can be real and genuinely follow Christ where ever and however He leads.  Not copying other churches, but learning from them.  Not landing in a particular camp, but embracing our cumulative community make up.  Not chiseling into stone our style, but changing as Christ changes us.

And if we are known for anything, let it be that we love; in the truest sense of the word; with a Christ like love that speaks truth, showers grace, welcomes all and gives generously.

When in Doubt, Google!

My family is known for not backing down in an argument.  I hear phrases like, “I’m 100% sure,” and “I’m positive.”  It can be as important as discussing the fate of the world or as meaningless as who’s turn it is to do the dishes.  Most of the time it’s over topics that neither side really knows, like actors in movies and music titles.

My wife has come up with the best argument solution ever.  When in doubt, Google.  How did we ever solve arguments before?  Not only do we have a computer in almost every room, but we now have it on our phones as well.  We can Google anytime and anywhere.  No more arguments.  No more useless bickering.  Ain’t technology great?

Who played Mark Zuckerberg in Social Network?  Michael Cera or Jesse Eisenberg? Google it.  Have a marriage problem?  Google it.  Need advice on a job search?  Google it.  Thinking about becoming a follower of Jesus.  Google it.  Who needs God?  Google answers every time.  Does he?  Google will give you just about any answer you want, as long as you don’t mind searching through the 875,592 pages it pulled up for you.

Don’t get me wrong, I think Google is great for many things, but it is still only as good as the information that is put in.  It truly is GIGO.  Not true with God.  I don’t care how much garbage you give him, he never spits it back.  His way of settling the argument is not to give the answer every time, but to show you the right question to ask.  Most arguments in our house are not about the topic, but about being right.  And as far as God is concerned, you’re right when you put the other person first.

So the next time we have an argument and need to search Google to get the answer, we will.  But we will also ask God about it.  He may help us see that being together is better than being right.

Sensory Perception

How often do you think about your senses? When you hear a beautiful song? After the first drops of rain saturate the air, filling your nose with childhood memories? As chocolate melts across your tongue?

Most of the time I don’t think about my senses. I think about what I am experiencing. But I am right now and I am grateful for them.

My eyes see the grandeur of the Andes and the destruction of Haiti.

Your ears hear thunder and whispers.

Our hands can forge a steel blade that cuts through bone and they can hold a delicate needle to stitch the wound.

Children’s tongues taste the tartness of a crisp green apple and the smooth sweet warmth of the caramel it is dipped in.

A mother’s nose can smell when the milk has gone bad even when the date has not expired and they can discover the magnolias in blossom before they walk around the corner.

God spared no expense at giving us the most amazing input devices on the planet. It is no accident that we can experience the best and worst of life with them. God wants you to experience the world, experience life, and experience him. He wants us to take everything in. Let it warm us and fill us. Let it motivate us and challenge us.

When you see something different today, don’t just let it go by. When you taste something new, don’t allow you life to be unchanged.

There are amazing and horrific and wonderful and subtle sounds, tastes, sights, textures and smells to be experienced. They are not by chance and they are not without purpose.

How will you make sense of it all today?

Cool Hand Luke Syndrome

If you’ve seen the movie, you know the line. You may know the line and have never seen the movie. Paul Newman was a convict determined to be free. The warden was a man committed to keeping order. The two were destined to clash. (I have to give a quick side note. I watched the movie the other day with my teenage kids and they asked if that was the guy who made the salad dressing. Sadness.)

“What we have here…is a failure to communicate.” That line clarified the gaping chasm between the warden and Luke over expectations and presuppositions.

We all have been in this situation before. He said, she said, he heard, she heard. Sometimes what is spoken is not what is heard and what is said is not what was meant. Language is one thing. Communication is a whole other issue.

I “ask” my kids to help clean up. They “hear” that dad wants them to do unnecessary manual labor. My wife “asks” if an outfit looks ok. I “hear” that she wants me to give my opinion. I tell her the truth that “it’s” not that great. She hears that I think “she” looks ugly.

Women aren’t wrong for asking. Men aren’t wrong for saying. We just need to hear with different ears and speak more than words. If only life were that simple. Our need to be understood both as a hearer and a talker is profound. But our bent toward imperfection is great. Somewhere in between words floating through the air, meanings get convoluted and feelings get hurt.

So much of communication is based in relationship. Without context, there cannot be language. Without relationship, there cannot be communication. If I don’t know you, it is a lot more difficult to communicate effectively without misunderstandings and misgivings.

Now bring God into the picture and we begin to see where things really go wrong. God says “Do not get drunk with wine, but be filled with the Holy Spirit. He is trying to tell us that Spirit empowerment is so much better than that euphoric feeling after a little too much wine, but we here, “Do not drink.” God says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and don’t lean on what you know. In all your ways acknowledge Him and he will direct your path.” He is trying to tell us that he will help us find our way, but we here “Do what I say.” As if we are little children who don’t know anything.

God’s ways can only be understood in the context of relationship. Like a parent telling a child what to do, it’s out of a loving relationship that wants the best for the child. Communication is a learned discipline, forged over time from continuous interaction and responsiveness on both sides.

If I’m not hearing God well, it’s probably because I’m not continuously connecting with him. I know he hears me. I know he understands me. If we have “a failure to communicate,” I think I need to get reconnected and spend some quality time in his presence. Time with him brings a clarity to what he says and a preciousness to what we have.

Snow Bored.

I’m not a big fan of the snow. Not much for the desert either. I like the water.

My oldest son is a snow boarder. Today he is going to try to teach me how again. The first time ended with a bruised tailbone and a distaste for the white stuff.

Snow is beautiful. Don’t get me wrong. Majestic mountains draped in a cloak of pristine white are an amazing site. Especially with the sunrise reflecting it’s golden hues and purple shadows. But that beauty is better experienced at a distance…in pictures…in a warm room. When you are knee deep in it, it’s cold and cumbersome and wet. It invades your shoes, freezes your hands and breaks your back when clearing the driveway. Forget the fact that you are so bundled up that you can hardly move and if you have to pee, well…you’re screwed.

The youngest son in the house loves to quad in the high desert. He comes home looking like a raccoon when he pulls his goggles off. Burms and dirt and speed all thrill him. All I see is dust in my eyes, grit in my teeth and rocks in my shorts.

Desert sunsets are hard to beat, I will admit. The red skies painted with silhouettes of Joshua trees and yucca are beautiful. Campfires and roasted marshmallow are still a favorite of mine. But dirt in my sleeping bag and showers from a hanging bag are not my thing.

Give me the liquid fun. Wake boarding on water like glass. Jumping the wake on a Sea doo. Floating on a tube with your feet in the water and a drink in your hand. Now that’s paradise.

I’m happy to take my kids places they like to go, but as for me and my fun, I will take the river.

I look good in CHEAP

I lost my prescription glasses over the summer and I'm too much of a tightwad to by a pair at full price so I waited 6 months till my vision plan would cover them. Turns out I have to wait another year to get my FREE pair, but at least my exam was free.

So I was looking for an affordable pair and all the ones I tried on that I didn't like were expensive and then i came across a pair that looked good. Low and behold, they were the least priced ones on display.

As I took joy in my discovery, I realized, "Anyone can look good in expensive, but I can look good in CHEAP." I left optometrist's office happy and not so broke. It was a good day.

This Page is Intentionally Left Blank

Ok, so I decided to add something to this page. I started to think that people would not get why I put it here. It was to get you to ask, "why?"

Have you ever wondered why documents have these pages? I don't understand why they have to explain. If I run across a blank page, I go to the next page with text on it. Are there people who stop at the void and don't know what to do? If they attempt to cross the emptiness, do they think they will fall in? Are they afraid that if there is a blank, then they might be missing something?

Content providers, whether in print or screen, often cater to the lowest common denominator. I guess some people are that dumb. They can't see that a new section started or that the content flowed across the blankness.

I hate when movie writers "flashback" at key moments to "remind" us of something earlier. Are we that stupid? I hope not. If our society is that dumb, then we are really screwed.

God sometimes leaves pages intentionally blank. Our lives are so full of business and noise. We need space to listen, to rest, to reflect. Still water reflects best. Maybe God is creating an empty place for him to enter in. Our cluttered thoughts often leave little room for him to move.

I am going to leave a section blank below. It's intentional. Your not missing anything. You won't fall in. Feel free to enjoy the space or skip to the next section. And if you feel the need to fill it, write a comment and let's see what it brings out in you. Give God space to enter today. See what happens.

























Did it work?

Out of Gas

Literally. I ran out of gas this morning. My daughter went to LAX last night and when she got home she said that the light came on indicating low fuel. When I got in the car, it was low, but I thought I had enough to drive less than a mile to drop my sons off at school and then go around the corner to get gas. I ran out just as I dropped the boys off.

Fortunately, my daughter was home and she brought me a gas can and we got it over to the gas station to fill up. Sixty dollars later, I was back on the road. Ouch.

I cut it close a lot. I ofter run the tank down till the warning indicator is as bright as the sun. Yellow lights are an invitation to clear out my carborator. Bills aren't due till the "grace period" expires (I'm not really that bad, but I don't pay early except for my mortgage and my credit card bills.)

Time is important to me. Any way I can add time to my life is a big plus. I drive fast so I have more time where I'm going. Buying in bulk saves me wasted trips to the store (I wish they sold milk in five gallon jugs. I am at the store all the time for milk. Maybe we need a cow.) My truck is full of tools and supplies so I don't have to go and get a needed item. It saves time.

Productivity and efficiency are an addiction for me. Do they have support groups for that? Wasting time drives me nuts. Slow people make me go crazy.

I think I need to run out of gas more often and relax. It's time to slow down and not always have "up time." Which is perfectly OK with me. I could use some "down time." As long as I can have my computer with me and my Blackberry. That way I can get some things done while I am lying around doing nothing.

Motivational sweat

Is there such a thing? I don't know about you, but skin secretion does not conjure up thoughts of creativity or change for me. It might move me to sit somewhere else or avoid contact, but I am not feeling changed for the better.

Thomas Edison said that genius was one percent inspiration and ninety nine percent perspiration. I would have to agree. People don't get good at something or arrive at profound discovery by mistake. It comes from hard work and practice.

That goes for art, science, sports, business and spirituality. Kobe Bryant may have had natural talent, but he is where he is because he works hard at it. Leonardo Di Vinci spent years studying the human body while painting and sculpting. Brother Lawrence did not amass a following because he was born spiritual. He devoted himself to practice Gods presence.

Sometimes we have inspired moments. I was reading some of my past blogs entries and I don't even remember writing them. A few of them are truly inspired.

Sometimes we have honest moments. We simply are in the moment and we write it like it is.

Then there are times when you write because it's the right thing to do. It's not inspired, it's not raw, it's just good practice.

Not every song on an album is a #1 hit. Someone recently told me that Michael Jackson has some 300 unpublished songs. I am sure some of that writing honed his art to produce a lot of great songs.

So I write today for the practice. And to get caught up. I now have one entry for everyday of this year. Woo Hoo.

Waves of Regret

Ok, so I am already wishing I didn't start this project. Why would anyone commit to writing something everyday? What was I thinking. I don't need more work to do. I am already on mental overload. Maybe I wasn't thinking. Maybe I was feeling something. My heart needed an outlet. That's all fine and dandy, but why did I say I would do it every day. That's insane...or insanely amazing! How else am I going to challenge myself without some kind of accountability.

My wife is reading the book,"Switch." It's about effective ways to bring about change. They say you have to engage the head and the heart if you are going to make people change. That is what this blog is for me. The writing engages my heart. The discipline to do it everyday will engage my head. The end result will hopefully be a heart disciplined in the practice of expression.

I will feel a lot better about this in 360 days. For now, it's day by day. Welcome to my life. Glad you could join me.

Thy Ever Feisty Mix

Everybody has the challenge of what to do with the new year. Do we make resolutions? Do we make them and say nothing, thus avoiding the sneers of others when we fail? Or do we simple do nothing and keep recycling our lives?

A friend of mine did a photography project last year. He took at least one picture everyday for the whole year. Sounds easier that it is. Try coming up with 365 different pictures that say something.

I am going to attempt the same thing with words this year. Not always a lot of words. Some times too many words. But I need to get my hands moving and my thoughts flowing. I spend hours in the car every day just thinking.

I think, "We need a new system for granting drivers licenses. There are far too may idiots on the road." I ponder, "My wife and I make quadruple what we made 20 years ago. Where does all the money go?" I reflect on God's amazing love and that I don't deserve it, but somehow he keeps showering it on my day after day.

Your don't want to know everything I am thinking. But I should write some of it down before my head can't hold it any longer.

So why "Thy Ever Feisty Mix?" It's an anagram for "My Three Sixty Five." And it will be a feisty mix of anecdotes, quips and ramblings. No guarantees of appropriateness, but you will absolutely get offended, challenged or encouraged at some point in the year.

Here's to 2011. Some say Jesus is coming back this year. Some say the world will end in 2012. I say, "Let's take it a day at a time and live for this moment." It may be our last, but it may be the start of something better.

Happy New Year.